According to CPP, Inc, 85% of employees experience some kind of conflict, resulting in approximately 2.8 hours each week involved in conflict.
Most of us have at least one coworker that spikes our blood pressure the second they open their mouth. Unfortunately, avoiding that coworker is rarely an option, especially if it’s a boss. Thankfully, there’s another option.
Buddhist nun and author Pema Chödrön was recently interviewed by Oprah on Super Soul Sunday about her “Just Like Me” exercise. Pema has spent over three decades teaching us how to practice love, compassion, and kindness, so when she said she had a technique for conquering frustration and transcending resentment, I knew it was going to be good.
Pema Chödrön with Oprah Winfrey on the “SuperSoul Sunday” show | Photo from SuperSoul Sunday
According to Pema, the “Just Like Me” exercise can be practiced anytime you feel frustrated or resentful, whether you’re stuck in traffic or sitting in a frustrating meeting. When you feel these negative feelings start to bubble up, focus on the people or person triggering these feelings and tell yourself, “They’re just like me.”
“Just like me, that person wants to be loved.”
“Just like me, that person wants to be seen.”
“Just like me, that person wants to be valued.”
“Just like me, that person wants to be heard.”
Instead of sitting at your desk, fuming and stewing in irritation, you can choose to see the other person’s humanity. They truly are just like you. They feel the same emotions, they have the same fears, and they want the same things. By being intentional in how you view the person who is frustrating you, you can change the entire vibe of the situation, and therefore, the rest of your day. Now, you have a choice. You can let a poor interaction with your boss first thing in the morning destroy your mood for the rest of the day. OR, you can be intentional in how you view them, letting you function at a higher vibration and improving your mood.
Which will you choose?
To hear Pema explain the “Just Like Me” exercise herself, click here.